Going Inward This Season

The last few weeks have been filled with me REALLY feeling the restlessness that all wild women do. My restlessness kicks in and I'm looking up flights, quick getaways and filling my partner's ears with ideas of adventures on how I want travel and explore. 

As I almost purchased 2 plane tickets yesterday my phone buzzed and my partner said "so many weekends out of town.. Is this worth the trip.." At first, I rolled my eyes at this message and then started thinking about reflection. With all of this planning and excitement, I started to see a pattern I was creating for this season of not taking time to be introspective and reflective. I've noticed that I've spent less time writing, less time meditating in the mornings, more time thinking about future plans. And yes, this is all okay. We don't need to do all of the things, all of the time.

I thought about how we've completed Winter which is a season for being inward, introspective and slowing down and we are now in Spring heading quickly towards Summer. So how do we keep staying introspective and reflective when we are feeling this energy of planning and restlessness.. 

What does being still look like for you during cycles such as this? Is it taking a few extra minutes on that hike to check-in with yourself, is it taking time to appreciate the flowers as you walk to work or maybe it's waking up and writing a few morning pages. I invite you to reflect on what this looks like for you. We don't need to change our practices or take on new ones to adhere to the current cycle but perhaps adding some variety into what works for you, will assist with being in the flow that is life. 

A sweet share from my heart to yours- The bus ride from my little tree lined neighborhood to downtown is usually packed with humans staring at their phones and preparing for their workday. But on this rainy day, I noticed none of that. The bus was chatty. Many of the people on the bus were exchanging morning conversations with those around them. I took a huge breath. This made me smile and I felt such an immense amount of gratitude within. I felt gratitude for human connection. I took a few extra moments this morning to express to myself all of what I felt grateful for in this present moment.

As I practice this, I feel gratitude expand within me. I feel lighter and it sets the tone for my day. For me, this is a way for me to go inward throughout my day no matter where I am. I don't need to set my alarm, light incense, pull a card or write to do this. I just let myself be in these moments. 

Sweet grace to you.

x
Danielle

Witnessing Magic

As a little girl, I always believed in magic. I knew that this world was FULL of magical things happening around us all of the time. I knew that all you needed to do was to be open to seeing it. As the little fairy in me grew, changed and grew into a witch, my belief and understanding of this magic, deepened. I knew it existed and I wanted more. I wanted to witness it more. I want to BE it.

There was a point in time where I was clouded by other things around me. I was clouded by relationships, substances, the unknowing of my own soul and the realness of who I was. As I began on my own journey, I started to unveil each layer of my being. I couldn't run away from these patterns that I had once tried to run away from. I had to face them. I had to get comfortable with the uncomfortable. I had to let go of those limiting beliefs, the self-deprecating talk, get clear on what I wanted to attract into my life and through that, I had to let parts of myself die. Because how can you see clearly when you're putting a lens over your eyes. At some point, through my own journey, I came back to that little girl who believed in magic. 

For me, magic shows up when I witness myself expanding and opening up in relationships, when I get real and voice my honesty, when I whisper to my spirit guides and they let me know, in their own way, that they hear me. 

The thing that excites me about magic? This journey doesn't end. It's continues. It's infinite. When I think about this, I'm brought back to that feeling of excitement I felt as a little girl, to witness more magic. To create more. To be magic and to fully embrace this. As I continue on this journey of mine to learn more, make mistakes, grow, shift, change, embrace, love and so much more, I look forward to witnessing more magic each day.

Tell me, what does magic feel like for you? What happens when you start to believe in that? Let me know, I would love to hear.

Star dust and cosmic love to you.

x
Danielle

Recovering People-Pleaser

Full transparency here. For a long time, ahem, actually, my whole existence in this current lifetime, I've been a people-pleaser. I'd say 'yes' when I really didn't want to, I'd hold back on expressing what I was really thinking, I'd cater to everyone else's needs around me so that I wouldn't disrupt anything, I'd say 'sorry', I took jobs that forced me to be agreeable and a people-pleaser but I was miserable in them and I felt responsible for other people's feelings. I wasn't being real, I wasn't being myself and I wasn't living in integrity. I felt uncomfortable voicing my opinion or speaking up because I felt like my thoughts and feelings weren't valued enough to be voiced.  

The TRUTH is- I didn't know how to put myself first and didn't feel comfortable doing so until I had someone else's approval (hi validation..). I didn't know what self-care was. And I'm not talking about the self-care that includes journaling, taking baths, meditating etc.. I'm talking about uncomfortable self-care like getting out of relationships that aren't serving you and being OK with it, saying 'no' + being honest about it, learning that you don't need to give people an explanation, having conversations that don't always feel good, being firm from a loving place, embracing vulnerability and taking ownership. 

This has been a deep-rooted trait that I couldn't get ahold of. The little girl in me would bubble to the surface and want to hide away when I had to speak up. She wanted to go upstairs to her room and play where she didn't need to deal with any of this. If I pretend like it's not happening right now, it'll go away, right?  

Internally, I felt like I was screaming but no one heard me. I was making life a lot harder for myself. I couldn't actually get close to living my truth and doing the things that I knew I wanted to bring into my life until I got serious and faced this blockage. 

What did I do? To start, I asked myself what my life would look like if I wasn't a people-pleaser? Then I slowly started taking some small steps.. I stopped before responding to messages to give myself time to think if what I was saying was aligned with how I was feeling, if I didn't want to do something I would say 'no' and be completely honest about it, I stopped feeling the need to give an explanation to others, I left the people-pleasing jobs behind me and I thanked them for the life lessons because I deeply believe there are life lessons in each experience. Most of all, I committed myself to using my voice. I use it through this platform, I use it in exchanges with other people, I use it through music and I have made a commitment to myself to continue to use it.

This is still something that comes up. I've said this previously, but this takes acknowledging and practice to work through this. For me, it means checking-in with myself, getting the support that I need, being honest about where I'm at and understanding that this has been a lifelong pattern so it's going to take time. 

So let me ask you.. If you've found yourself feeling these words and it speaks to you, what does life without being a people-pleaser look like? And how are you living in integrity with yourself? 

Sometimes when we want to change something, we set these high expectations for ourselves and soon become disappointed when those expectations aren't met. What if we decided for today to just take 1 step towards your goal. Take 1 step to cutting out the people-pleasing trait or whatever it is that you're working towards. See how that feels. 

Loving you and all of you,

Danielle 

 

I'm Healing.

A friend of mine wrote me an email catching up. She asked me how I was doing since my dad passed. When I wrote her back I started to type 'I'm doing okay with my dad..' But then I stopped. I pressed backspace. Something felt off with what I just wrote. Part of my being is committing myself to staying in integrity. That entails being honest with myself. In that moment, those words didn’t entirely feel like they were accurate. I had just cried that morning on the metro. I looked at the email for a few minutes and rewrote the sentence. I typed 'I'm healing from losing my dad..' I felt a sigh of relief. My inner self was happy that I wrote the truth. 

When my dad first passed away, I downplayed how heartbroken I was. It was challenging for me express all of the sensitivities involved with grief. Not only was it challenging but I was exhausted from having the same conversation. I felt triggered when others would say 'I can't imagine how that feels' and I felt triggered when my sweet friends didn't say anything. I downplayed how much pain I was actually in. I wanted to be strong and handle it. And I was acknowledged for being “strong.” Something didn't feel right and it was that I wasn't fully being honest when speaking out loud. I was getting clear with what my new normal was, I was letting others meet me halfway, I was open about what I could and couldn't do, I was letting myself cry when I needed to and feel everything. But still something was feeling off.

People would say 'i'm sorry' and I would respond with 'it's okay.' I wasn't fully being vulnerable in these moments. A mentor/friend/coach/teacher/soul sister of mine who has dealt with grief said 'I want you to stop saying I'm sorry. Try saying thanks'. So I started practicing this. The first few times I said it, part of me wanted to follow-up with 'it's okay'. I felt vulnerable AF, it felt raw and it stung. I sat there and asked myself what the hell is wrong with saying I'm healing from X. None of us are perfect. No one constantly has their shit together all of the time. All of us are healing from something. So why are we so afraid to be vulnerable? What would it look like if we lived in a place of truth/honesty AND vulnerability? For one thing- we'd stop putting on a front that everything is okay and be real with our healing. 

Part of the reason that I want to be open about my healing is to get real with myself, tell the truth, let others support me, and allow myself the space for vulnerability. All of these things enable me to be a better coach. Being vulnerable actually makes you stronger than acting like you've got it. I'm devoted to healing through vulnerability. I cry a lot. I feel grateful that I have individuals in my life to give me that space, that support my vulnerability and a partner who constantly has his hands at my back.  

How do you and your body react to vulnerability? What commitments have you made around this space for yourself?

For me, writing this piece and talking about healing is me committing to my healing. I made a commitment a few months ago to write more, to express myself more and to use my voice. So this is that happening and my wish for you, is that you feel empowered to do the same in whatever capacity that means for you.  

x
Danielle 

Express Yourself

I was in a yoga class a few weeks ago when my teacher asked 'What if we trusted ourselves and our own experiences to use our voice, rather than trust that someone else's experience and voice weighs greater?'

This made me smile, I deeply felt what he said. Immediately, I thought of using my voice and expressing my needs. Actually, what I thought of was how not using my voice and/or expressing my needs was what has had the most presence in my life. For years, it felt like this huge hurdle that I could not get over. This is still something that I'm sensitive to and will catch myself encountering those blockages. When those blockages come up, I remind myself that this is all practice not perfection (hi perfectionist side). When I wasn't expressing my needs; I was being agreeable, saying 'yes' when I wanted to say 'no', being a people-pleaser, not using my voice, and trusting others' words over my own. Sounds exhausting, right?

While I was going through my coach training program, my teacher asked us about our relationship to expressing our needs. I got silent and felt my stomach drop. This was something I wasn't doing. I wasn't practicing it. I was trying to bypass it which was leading to more stress than if I actually just expressed myself. I knew this needed to shift. I needed to practice saying what I needed and I needed to use my voice. 

The first thing was to get clear on what my needs were in all areas of my life (self-care, friendships, romantic partnerships, family relationships, finances, career, etc..). After that, I started to check-in with myself throughout my day. Throughout my conversations with other individuals, I would ask myself; 'did you get what you needed..' 'do you need to go back and revisit that conversation..' 'is there anything that you feel needs to be added..' This helped significantly with getting clear on my needs. Having clarity around my needs has made the whole expressing part have much more flow. 

Expressing myself in the moment and using my voice is a constant practice that I have in my life. Like anything else, it's something that takes time to nurture and grow. As I commit to practicing this, it gets easier with time and I acknowledge myself for using my voice. 

What becomes possible when you express your needs? Tell me about it if this resonates.  

Today I acknowledge you for listening to yourself, for using your voice and expressing your needs. 

x
Danielle

Dream of the Possibility

Coming to you post New Moon in Sagittarius. Last month I talked about the act of release and letting go. Fall is a beautiful time to let go of things in our space that are no longer serving us. The New Moon is the perfect time to dream about the possibility. It’s a time when we plant seeds for what we want to bring into our space. It’s a time to manifest and dream. 

As we wrap up the year and get to reflect upon the last 12 months, we also reflect upon what we want to bring into our space for the next year. What do you want to bring into each area of your life? Get clear and BE SPECIFIC. We can do this throughout the entire year. We don’t need to wait until the end of the year to manifest and create what we desire.  

Let’s take a look at each area of your life and think about what you want to bring into that space. Make a list and don’t filter it. After making a large list, scale it down. Be specific and pick out what really calls to you. Envision it. Really lean into what it would FEEL like to bring this into your life. What does that look like for you? Is it a letter to yourself with that goal already present in your life? Is it a vision board? Is it journaling on it? As I always say, pick a practice that works best for you but I invite you to really feel what it’s like to have this goal in your life. Be in it.

The Winter Solstice is this Thursday, December 21st. It’s a time for us to hit the reset button and slow down as we enter this new season of stillness. Take time for yourself over the next few weeks. Recover from the busy holiday season and be easy on yourself as you enter the New Year. 

Sending you love and peace until next time.

X
Danielle

The Season for Releasing

Happy Fall, Samhain Blessings and my favorite time of year. I’ve been fortunate to be in circle a few times over the last month with different groups of women. Being in circle creates sacred space, ignites connection and enables healing. Healing. Healing has a large presence in my life at the moment. I’m grieving a huge loss that has happened in my life. Part of this healing, for me, includes the act of releasing.

With the season of Fall, we are reminded of the process of letting go. We let go what no longer serves us. This could be an old habit, a relationship, a limiting belief we are holding onto and the list goes on. It’s a time to get introspective and release as we prepare to move to the stillness that Winter feeds us. I spoke with a friend the other day about things in my life that felt hard right now or challenging. The word anxiety came up. Anxiety has been making its way into my space over the last 6 months and to be totally honest, I've been trying to ignore it. Over the last few months, I’ve written down in my journal that I’m releasing the anxiety. I’ve written it down on paper and burned that paper during ceremonies. But that isn’t enough. I needed to create action around what I wanted to release. So I was asked, what would it take for anxiety to feel better? I loved this question. My answer- talking about it, feeling supported and committing to spending more time doing the things that bring ease into my life.

The act of writing down what we want to release or burning it, is powerful. But what else.. What’s the next step? Let’s create commitment around this release. What steps are you committed to taking around this release? Perhaps your action item is creating a mantra or it’s reframing that limiting belief and changing it into something positive. Maybe it’s scheduling in a 3-minute check-in each day. Write down what feels best for you. 

I invite you to journal on what’s in your space at the moment that you would like to release. What is no longer serving you? Do you have any beliefs or stories that you would like to leave in the past? Write them down.

Almost done.. When you release, see how it feels to release with gratitude. For example- I’m grateful for the anxiety that bubbles up because it gives me the opportunity to check-in with myself more. It gives me the chance to connect with my intuition and REALLY listen to what I need in that moment. So what if we release but release with gratitude? What if we reframe these things that are in our space and release with love...

If you’re having a blockage on releasing, listen to this powerful meditation that was recommended to me by a friend. I did this meditation and it helped to bring my mind and heart into an attunement.

Enjoy this harvesting time and sending you love.

X
Danielle

Are You Connected With Your Inner Guidance?

As my first post, I intuitively felt called to speak on inner guidance. What’s inner guidance? Simply, your inner guidance is your intuition. It’s listening to your core, your heart center and syncing up your mind with these spaces. It’s listening to your spirit guides, the universe, the divine or however you wish to call it and connecting with them. It’s speaking and acting from your true self.

Do you ever speak up about something and then question what you’ve said a million times? Or before you make any decision, do you call your friends or family to seek approval? Does your fear speak over your intuition regularly?

I feel you, love, and I’ve been there.

Let me share a piece of myself with you. A while back, a family member of mine went for a session with their medium. The medium told them that I needed to start believing in myself. When I heard this, I felt defensive. Immediately I said to myself “Ha! that’s absurd, I do believe in myself.” I was confident with who I was but to be totally real with you, my actions were speaking A LOT louder than my words. I would text or call family and friends any time I needed to make a tough decision. And for me, as an indecisive Libra, I would text them about a wide range of anything. When something would happen that left part of me feeling frustrated, confused or sad, I would need to let not just one, but multiple people know. How many people did I need validation from that I was right in ending a relationship or that moving to a new place was the next step? We get it. This left me not only dependent on my relationships but completely disconnected from my intuition. It left me feeling energetically exhausted.

When I began to dig out my own path and create a life that would align with my true self, this disconnection surfaced in a strong way. The gods and goddesses were essentially smacking me across the face while screaming “intuition!” It became more apparent to me that I wasn’t believing in myself. Knowing that, brought up more stuff.

I wanted this to shift and I knew that I desired to take ownership. I love that word ownership. Ownership is different from control. When we want control, we are so focused on the outcome. We cannot trust ourselves, others or any entity that we believe in. Taking ownership of our power and relationships allows us to create boundaries to teach others to treat us with respect. I OWNED the fact that there was a huge gap between my mind, voice and intuition. As someone who is intuitive, I was seriously disconnected from my intuition. In this context, I don’t mean intuition like meeting someone and your intuition is telling you to run. I mean fully being in the present, with your TRUE SELF and connected with your intuition. And so it began, a relationship between myself and my intuition. I began to take the steps that I desired to heal that relationship. The first step was recognizing and being curious about this disconnection. It’s a constant relationship that invites me to dig deeper. I’m grateful for the relationship that I have with her and the nurturing that I give to her.

We spend such a great deal of time worrying about the relationships around us but the most important relationship is the one with yourself.

So let me ask you, does any of this resonate? Are you fully in connection with your inner guidance? Let’s not wait any longer to mend this relationship. I invite you to think about this and I challenge you to bring a practice into your life that connects these pieces back together. Remember, the first step is recognizing and being curious. Tools to use could include meditation, journaling or mindset practices.

Feeling called to connect with your inner guidance? I’d love to invite you for a free inner guidance session with me. Connect with me here. Interested in hearing more from me? Hop on the email train by clicking here for some of my practices, tools and goodies.

x
Danielle